While the first step to being sexy is to simply enjoy the amazing feelings inspired by the endless beauty around you, the second step is to share those appreciative feelings.This can be scary, especially after a lifetime of cultural programming and past flirting experiences being loaded with the common pitfalls we discussed above.

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The final confusing feeling commonly associated with flirting is expectation.

Like anxiety, this feeling that’s often confused with sexuality stems from your tendency to jump into your head to avoid your feelings.

This can make the other person feel overwhelmed by your feelings, since they’re disproportionate to the moment.

When both individuals do this to each other it typically leads to relationships that start hot and end disastrously.

You must become more aware of the confusing feelings that try to derail this natural process, and practice brushing the thoughts they create away.

Then, simply return to enjoying the pleasure buffet that God/nature has spent billions of years preparing for you.

Instead of communicating appreciation for our sexual feelings, we’re only communicating anxiety.

This naturally makes others feel less comfortable around us and sends us the signal, “my sexual feelings make others uncomfortable”.

It’s the fault of a culture that gives a detailed education on how to look sexy or even act in specific sexy ways (talk like this, say that), but fails to teach us how to be a sexual person.

This leads to a disconnect between a person’s “sexual side” and the person they are around others most of the time.

Now that we’re clear on what flirting isn’t, we can finally talk about what it is.