Any stalling, or worse, attempts at reconciliation are red lights for you to put a stop to seeing him until he is officially, legally single. If so, that tells you that he is willing to work on disagreements as well as letting you know that the divorce was not a rash decision.

If he cannot or will not follow through on this, what kind of follow through will he have in regards to his commitment to you? Does he acknowledge his role in the marriage falling apart? If he says phrases like, "I'm not perfect" or "I really tried," take these as cues that his relationship with you will also feature him making an effort when needed.

dating someone who is going through a divorce with kids-85

Dating someone who is going through a divorce with kids portland oregon dating site

If his discussion of the divorce is a one hundred percent blaming of his soon-to-be ex-wife, take a step back. If, at the core, the problem with his wife was a drug or alcohol problem, she may be responsible for a big part of the breakup, but he may have developed co-dependent tendencies.

This means that he needs to be part of a relationship drama instead of part of a relationship.

When you're losing a partner through divorce, or more accurately for many people, when a divorce finalizes the loss of a partner who's been gone for a while, it's very tempting to seek out new companionship. Meagan has stated several times in our divorce counseling that she's entitled to since Colin did (without her) during their marriage.

Since their separation more than 6 months ago they've handled the custody of their 3 kids 50/50.

You might actually become a mini-expert on your state's legal nuances involving separation and community property. This is often a turnoff, but you can make this time matter for you in addition to just being a shoulder to cry on.

Listen carefully to what he says about the judge's rulings; the law is based on reasonable expectations.

If she disapproved of his going to church on Sunday mornings, that tells you she was looking to end things regardless of his commitment.

If she left him because he did not have a job, that is a red flag – does he have a job now?

Does it sound like he was a heavier drinker then and is now sober or cutting back his drinking?

Does he have bouts of anger that might indicate his ex-wife was afraid of him?

With the "slow it down warning" emblazoned on the relationship, let's look at the possible pitfalls your man presents.