The Gathering Storm First things first: Let's diagnose the situation.

Just because your blood pressure is so high you swear other people can hear it doesn't mean you're suffering from teenager-your daughter might be a "preteen," which is sort of like having a tornado before a hurricane hits.

Not only is this completely ridiculous, but if you allow your parents to express this thesis, they will become obsessed with the idea, and that's all you'll hear for the next decade.)I Need You, Leave Me Alone When children are young, dads regard themselves as giant shock absorbers, there to protect the family from the ruts and bumps on the road of life. You begin to see yourself as more like a coach, running your children through practice drills so they'll be better prepared when they have to go out and play the real game.

10 rules for dating my daughter show-17

If you've had a baby, or are engaged in breeding, I will tell you what you have to look forward to.

If it's been about a dozen birthdays since you brought home that darling little bundle of girl baby, I am willing to explain the skills and tactics you will need to make it through the next eight years with a minimum of trauma.

Here's a checklist that you can use to confirm your worst fears.

Warning Signs That You May Be Living with a Teenager- Your phone is always busy, so you put in a second line and it's always busy.- Your gas tank is always empty and your laundry basket is always full.- While you've generally been in favor of them up until now, suddenly "Miracle Bras" seem like a really bad idea.- You realize it's been more than a year since you haven't had to pay a late fee when you rent a video.- Your car insurance suddenly costs more than your car.

(My wife ignores my instructions and actually spends money trying to satisfy these adolescent appetites, which is a bit like trying to warm a winter day by turning up the heat and opening your windows.)Anyway, the world is positively teeming with teenagers, and as long as people continue to think about starting a family, the trend is likely to continue. I am only willing to accept the blame for the ones that my wife caused and have taken educational measures with her to make sure it doesn't happen again.

But if I am, indeed, surviving the experience, perhaps I can share with you some of the knowledge I have so painfully gained over what has been more than half a decade of tears, hormones, and stress fractures.One of the most common places to find a partner is at a nightclub (or a mutual friend’s party), which may seem pretty obvious.However, the way to meet someone there is more subtle.It’s not as easy as going up to someone and offer them a drink or ask them to dance.Many people see this as too forward and will get defensive if they are approached in this way.(Rule #1: if you pull into my driveway and honk, you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure as heck not picking anything up.)If your little girl has moved out and a teenager has taken her place, this book will help you do something you probably thought was not possible in your situation: laugh.